Trans in my town: And my heart pours out

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Submitted by think aloud on Thu, 08/10/2006 - 2:12pm.

Today, I acted as an advocate during a meeting with a trans woman in my region and one of the local human rights commission chairpersons. My role was to ask the questions that she forgot to ask, to facilitate the discussion when there were problems, and to generally advocate on her behalf. I was mostly a fly on the wall at the meeting. It was a difficult role for me for three reasons.

First, the person that I was advocating for has a very heart-wrenching story and tells it with a lot of emotion. Very raw emotion. She didn't break down or cry, but you could tell that she was hurt and angry.

Second, she doesn't want any media attention because she wants to protect her family, which I completely respect, but she can't file a complaint without the media being alerted, and as we learned this today, she visibly deflated. She went so far as to ask me to find out for her if I could file on her behalf (which I cannot). The media attention will certainly affect her decision about filing a formal complaint.

Finally, at the end of the meeting, I found out what her largest motive was: she wanted to get gender identity added to the nondiscrimination policy in the cities in our area. It was really touching for me to hear her talk so selflessly in terms of her experiences and the consequences she wanted to see in the city.

At the end of the meeting with the city council chairperson and the secretary to the mayor, they both seemed very interested in why my city did not have gender identity in it's HR resolution. They asked for my contact information and said that they would be contacting me for more information on gender identity. I think a really important contact was made. And a very selfless and heroic person made an important impact on the process of change.

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Posted in Activism · Discrimination · Identity · Our Community · Our Concerns · Public Accommodations | think aloud's blog · login or register to post comments · email this page · 34 reads »

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out there

#38 On Fri, 08/11/2006 3:15pm nclarkson said,

Good work Cianan. And thanks for sharing.

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advocate

#39 On Fri, 08/11/2006 3:44pm pennyjane said,

thanks think, first for advocating and then for sharing. Of course not knowing the circumstances of this woman's dilemna I imagine something very nasty. we here in bloomington recently had gender identity and expression added to our human rights code, but the code itself has but baby teeth. as a political statement, though, it was a big step forward. I know how nasty some can be eventhough my own transition has been pretty benign, we are for the most part a pretty sensitive group of people and so widely misunderstood. Just recently a good and well meaning friend caused me to dehydrate through to eyes after handing me what she thought was a compliment. First she told me how nice i looked that day, then to emphasize her compliment she continued, "if i didn't know you i'd think you really were a girl" how those things hurt and frustrate us. "a turd dipped in chocolate" was how a t-guy in my group put it, and though crude it's a fair analagy. i remember how angry and outraged i was when i first transitioned and lost my job and my church. i just could not fathom how people i liked and trusted could turn out to be so cruel and backwards. anyway, if there is anything i can do to help out, please let me know and if your friend would like to share with another girl of her stripe, don't hesitate to give her my email. thanks again for being there for her and for the energy i know it takes to be out there on the front lines. God bless you, lotsa love, pj

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