Some opening thoughts to "The Tranny Chaser Dialogues"...

Submitted by trannychaser on Sun, 07/02/2006 - 7:08pm.

This is not a fetish this is my life. I will try to understand you. Will you try to understand me?

The transcommunity is my community and I am not seeking permission to be a part of it. Just trying to explain myself and start an important conversation.

My first female-to-male lover (Logan) told me last night that using the label tranny chaser as an alias on the INTRAA website was a mistake. This echoed conversations that I had throughout the day with other transmen who I am friends with. They were all very supportive but had concerns that ranged from strategic political issues to fears of me misrepresenting myself to just being a plain creepy label.

So while I was talking to Logan last night about this an old sick feeling settled into my stomach. Not having a language to describe who I am, who I love, and who I am primarily attracted to doesn’t sit well with my social scientist desire to label things. I tried to explain it to him using a conversation we had together a long time ago about his sense of frustration with the absence of visual or written pornography that portrays his body or his desires in an authentic way. Something clicked and we had a very important conversation about objectification, desire, and language.

We talked about the fact that the label seems to make my attraction about transmen’s bodies. That seems to make everyone uncomfortable. Well, the truth is attraction is about more than bodies and we all know that. However, that said I am attracted to transmen’s bodies. Not all transmen’s bodies but the people in my life that I have been the most physically attracted to have been transmen. I wonder if that’s objectification? I wonder why its okay for my transmale lovers to be attracted to me based on my height or other parts of my appearance but I can’t be attracted to them based on their appearance?

I don’t buy it. Transmen are sexy and I think it is important that those of us who are attracted to them be honest about it.

I am a tranny chaser. Don’t get me wrong, I have had sex with more than one biological gay boy and it can be fun. It just happens to not be my primary attraction. If you met me or know me you probably think I act like a normal gay guy. Well, that’s because in most ways I am. I am attracted to queer masculinity. I don’t understand myself as outside the transcommunity or even an ally to the transcommunity.

So I am choosing tranny chaser to describe myself – to name my desire.

I invite discussion around this choice and my desires. If you prefer to talk to me privately feel free to contact me.

Posted in Identity · SOFFA · Tranny Chaser Dialogues | login or register to post comments · previous forum topic · email this page · 1616 reads »

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Tranny Chaser Dialogues: questions of gate keeping

#5 On Sun, 07/02/2006 11:46pm nclarkson said,

With the Tranny Chaser Dialogues in mind, I'm reflecting on a meeting I recently had about trans accommodations in housing at IU-Bloomington. Thinking about how I respond to non-trans people, and how I feel about their place in the trans community. There are non-trans people that I consider part of the trans community, especially when we're talking about doing political work. There's a way in which there's us--the people (trans and not) committed to doing work for INTRAA, in this case--and there are people who are our allies (who tend to have good intentions (usually) but don't really understand our issues in a complex way and aren't necessarily as committed to advocating for us).

It's not so simple as separating people into two or even three camps, though. For example, the guy I met with this morning has done quite a bit of work advocating for trans students in housing assignments and diversity education. He hired me to be a diversity educator and was really cool and open to learning. He also totally tokenized me and continues to do so without recognizing what he's doing. His frame of reference for understanding people different from him has some definite limits. Working with him frustrates me for sure, but I also generally trust him to do good work for trans students on campus.

There was another woman at the table, though, a straight non-trans woman who's an RA on campus. She has good intentions and is really trying. It's clear, though, that she understands herself as an ally, as someone who's helping out people less fortunate than herself. She can't seem to remember that trans people need to be involved in the conversations and work she's trying to do. I don't feel like she listens to what I say about my concerns or the concerns I anticipate other trans people having.

There are some important questions for me here. Why am I so unhappy with her and so skeptical of the work she's trying to do when I don't have the energy to do that work? How do I balance my complaints about being tokenized (I'm willing to be their token if only they'd call it what it is and remember that that's what's going on) with my complaints about the lack of trans representation? Especially when there are really only two of us transpeople on campus doing this work?

And a question that's more closely related to the "Tranny Chaser Dialogues" (but still not exactly on target in the context of those dialogues): should no one have to prove themselves for entry to the trans community? As I said, there are non-trans people that I feel are part of the trans community. Is there a profound difference between how or when significant others/partners/"tranny chasers" gain entry to the trans community as compared to political activists who aren't partnered with or attracted to transfolks? I think too it's worth thinking about how and when transpeople become part of the trans community. In a way, it doesn't make sense to ask that, but it's always been a question among transpeople, the "not trans enough" issue. How does gate keeping of transpeople relate to gate keeping of non-trans people? I imagine we'd agree that there are limits to our community and that a certain amount of gate keeping is necessary, but what are the limits?

login or register to post comments · email this page

"Change, when it comes, cracks everything open." - D. Allison

#29 On Sun, 07/23/2006 3:08am trannychaser said,

When I wrote my public profile and opened the conversation in the "Trannychaser Dialogues," I was considering reuniting with my first transmale lover. About a month and a half later, we have decided that we will not be getting back together but remain on good terms. I also was struggling with finding my voice as a member of the transgender community who also has more than one leg still in the gay male world.

There is an angry tone in the introduction because issues of identity are close to us and can really hurt. Interestingly enough, somewhere around last February I developed a crush on a younger gay guy who seemed to like me as well. After he figured out that I was extremely active in transgender politics and considered myself a part of the transgender community he was honest with me about the challenges that he felt like my life presented to him in regards to being in a relationship with me. That is my nice way of saying, he was a dick.

At the same time, as a spokesperson for Trans political issues in primarily LGB organizations and contexts often I am thought of as inauthentic and unable to speak for my organization. The gay men and lesbians around the table consider me "one of them" instead of a part of "those people."

Well, I don't understand myself that way at all. However, a week ago things changed in my life in a way that has made me reexamine how I articulate who I am. Two days after deciding that I no longer had any interest in pursuing a relationship with biological gay men, this cute boy met me at an activist meeting and later myspace stalked me.

We have since, seen each other every day(except for Monday - he just reminded me) and things are going remarkably well. he has spent more time with transpeople than I would guess he ever thought he would. He is taking to my people like a rockstar. I keep asking, "Are you okay?" and he says, "Stop asking me that, I am fine. They are just people."

I have felt compelled to seek affirmation about my place in the community and my continued presence at community events from friends all week. Today, I still went to the INTRAA board meeting, the Indyboyz social support group meeting, and much like any other night at 4a.m. I am putting content on the INTRAA website.

Everyone has been extremely supportive and nice to Matthew. We currently hope he sticks around for a little while, at least.

My fear is no longer with the transcommunity but how my gay colleagues will potentially frame my current situation. Now that I have a cute gay boyfriend, who happens to have a penis, I wonder will I be less authentically a representative of the transgender community?

I am primarily still attracted to transmen and queer mascuilinity. Ultimately, I am blessed to have a cute boy, who is smart, and trying to put up with me not be bothered by the details of my desire. He just seems glad that I like him.

login or register to post comments · email this page

tranniechasers unite.

#73 On Thu, 09/28/2006 9:25pm pennyjane said,

i ususally find keeping myself signed in to yahoo but invisible stops alot of nonsense, but tonight i've had myself available as i wanted to talk with someone and wanted her to know i was available. my yahoo profile shows and depicts me honestly. "very married, not interested in any extra-marital relationships." doesn't even slow these guys down. twice tonight i've been im'd by someone i don't know and within two minutes of introducing ourselves i've been asked to show my body on the webcam. when i say no, that i am not interested in seeing or showing bodies on the computer the pleas begin. "no no, don't take me wrong, i just want to be friends, i'm lonely." ok, friendshipRus. tell me a little about yourself. "i'm 6'1', muscular and hung like a donkey." gracious, that's why trannie chasers have such a bad name. so you hang up on them and they tingle another three or four approaches before they get the hint. makes a wrinkled up old broad like me grateful, it must be awful being young and pretty. some people are just obsessed with bodies, what's inside is pretty much irrelevant. sounds like a pretty destructive way to live to me but.....what do i know? i'm just a girl.

login or register to post comments · email this page

trannychaser

#30 On Mon, 07/24/2006 8:30pm pennyjane said,

creepy label.....to me it is. as a transwoman out and about i have to deal with this. when i first came out it was flattering, i didn't understand what was going on for quite some time. after being around it for awhile it gave me some real insight into what gg's go through all their lives. being a sex-object. it seems that for everything that exists in this world there is a sexual conotation and it is disturbing. if one is sexually attracted to trannies, why i can't comprehend, and treats us as real people it's ok, but as so often happens they can be terribly persistant. even when you do everything you possibly can to put them off, "i'm very happily married.....i'm monosexual.....I DON'T HAVE ANY SEXUAL INTEREST IN MEN WHAT SO EVER!!!" i have encountered those who for some reason believe they are the ones that will make the breakthrough. these are the trannychasers that give admirers a bad name. thanks for letting me know there is another perspective, i'll keep it in mind. lot's of love, pj

login or register to post comments · email this page

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.